Incident Report

Base: Fargo, North Dakota

Date/Time: 6/4/09, 9:10 p.m.

Incident: I own a cyber cafe in Fargo and I may have made a grave mistake today at my place of business. On our window sign we list our services as "console and pc gaming, pc repair, custom pc building." On the bottom it says "no vampires". We added that as a joke because Twilight was at the peak of its popularity when we opened the store. We where willing to deal with the nerdiest of nerds but none of us wanted to deal with social retardation that comes with a wannabe vampire.

Today, things changed because I received a phone call from a coffee shop called the Red Raven where a few friends of mine work. S-- from the coffee shop told me that she had three people claiming to be reformed Christian vampires and they where upset that they where not allowed in my store. They asked through her if was OK if one of them came over. Keep in mind this was all around 4:30 p.m. and the sun was definitely out. I said it was OK on the condition that none of them had ties to any form of shadow government and none of them drank blood. I chuckled and then I hung up.

I expected to see some goth kid in his teens or twenties but what I got was a guy in his mid-forties wearing very casual summer business clothes (white button-up shirt and khakis). He was about 5'8" with slanted shoulders and a somewhat pudgy build and his head was kind of big. He had the beginning onset of jowls and he had grayish-amber eyes. What set me off was that his skin was grayish and clammy looking.

He walked in very briskly and sat down on the couch facing the far left TV in front of the desk where I sit and take money. He then asked why I have that sign on my window. I told him about the Twilight thing and how it was more of a joke. He then told me how he was cured of his vampirism by looking into a candle flame and accepting Jesus into his heart. As soon as he accepted him into his heart he saw the angel Elijah and the city of Jerusalem become engulfed in flames. Since that day he has been able to walk in the sun and he doesn't crave blood, because Jesus gives him his blood through communion.

He then told me he had family ties to Vlad the Impaler and the Luciferian right Scot Masonic Sect or something like that. He left the freemasons because they allowed Muslim and Hindu sects and he said they where irrelevant because his people (vampires) were going to bring the apocalypse and set the world ablaze. He went on to say that he was blessed because even though his body is evil and of reptilian origin, he will be saved by god because he no longer has vampire powers and he had decided not to take part in causing the end of times. He then brought up the Lost Boys and insinuated that he was a hypocrite and that I should read Revelations chapters 1 and 2.

I would like to chalk up all this to a crazy guy ranting at me but while he was ranting at me I felt very stoned, like I was focused on his eyes but everything else behind him seemed to be farther behind him than it was.

I'll admit to smoking pot regularly but how does some stranger just put you in a trance like that?

To recap: He doesn't follow the normal vampire rules, he put me in a hypnotic state and I was dumb enough to invite him in.

At my immediate disposal I have a Walther p22 with .22lr cci velocitor hollow point rounds (1475 fps) and a WASR 10/63 and plenty of hollow points and five mags.

I'll read your site more in depth; I just thought I would relay what happened while it was fresh in my head.

I would really like to play video games in my store after close with the light off again some day soon.

Your help is very appreciated.

p.s., how well does a UV light work on a regular vampire? I want to know in case I am dealing with a figurehead of a larger network of vampires with different ranks and abilities.

Comments from Dr. Pecos: I can understand your discomfort, but if this man was out in the daytime then he was not a vampire. The story he gave about drinking the blood of Christ has been used by vampires for centuries as a way of gaining trust from potential victims. It doesn't have any scientific basis. Regarding your question about trances: yes, it's certainly possible for one person to hypnotize another. It's not easy, but it can be done. When they get you to do things against your will is when you have to worry. As for your last question, ultraviolet light is effective against vampires. It temporarily blinds them and, if strong enough, can set off a seizure. Of course, it's not always practical to deploy.